Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Surrender

While I was at Camp Eagle (WHICH ROCKED! But more on that later), I had a really deep conversation with God. Everyone in the camp was given a small wooden cross, and we were challenged to write something on the cross that God placed on our hearts. Mine was 'Surrender'. I tend to plan. A lot. And I really felt God telling me that I need to surrender to Him. To stop fighting Him, trying to get around Him. And it took a figurative knock on the head to figure out that that's impossible. He is my plan. My future.

Along with 'Surrender', I also wrote on my cross the words 'Love', 'Worship', 'Peace', 'Missions', and my favorite Bible verse, 2 Corinthians 12:9. 'Love' to remember to love people like Christ loved us. 'Worship' because I feel like God is telling me to worship Him with everything I do, every day. Every action, every word, every moment is in worship of Him, so I better straighten up. 'Peace' is what I've been told one of my spiritual gifts is. That whenever I talk to people, they calm down, become peaceful. I've even had a moment when I was comforting someone when they were super upset, and I had my hand on their back. I could physically feel peace flowing out of my fingers and into the person I was consoling. They stopped crying in minutes. It was one of the most amazing experiences I've ever had. God told me to continue to use this gift, for everyone and anyone who needs it. I realized that it's not my gift. It's His. I wrote 'Missions' on my cross because for as long as I can remember, I've always been pulled towards mission work. God told me that one day, I'll have my chance. He even told me where He wanted me to go. That was an intense moment. Last, I wrote 2 Corinthians 12:9 on my cross. "He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect through weakness.' Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." I've always felt like my weaknesses are something to be ashamed of. That if people find out about them, that they'll judge me for them. Every time I read that verse, I feel strengthened that God is being glorified through my weakness. So in a way, they aren't weaknesses at all.

<3